I wonder if she’s (identity undisclosed) my God-given opportunity to try to get to know someone for real. My opportunity to try to get to know her, even if it’s not for the sake of going out with her. I have to stop being so scared and stop thinking that a girl would never go out with me. Sometimes, you just might give off that certain charm they they’ll fall in love with, and hey, maybe it just won’t be that way. I just need to take opportunities I get, get to know people when the opportunity comes, and stop being so indifferent about it. My personality requires me to have interpersonal relations. I may hate people and being around them sometimes, but I need that one person…or two people, maybe…that can keep me going. I don’t need the whole city to support me, but I definitely need a few individuals.

Through my time in high school, I’ve definitely taken advantage of my academic opportunities. I’ve taken a leadership position in the school. But in my social life? I’ve had a few ins and outs, a couple outings. But how much do I have to show for it? I have a couple of really good friends and other people I talk to here and there, but I’m never at any social happenings and I have very few pictures with anyone else. This is not to be faulted to the people who hold the parties or the gatherings; sometimes, I decline the invitations I get. I don’t think any one individual person, besides myself, can be blamed for my lack of sociability.

In college, that has got to change. Somehow, someway.